19

So much more beautiful and wise.

That being my rather sarcastic answer to the classic What is it like to be 19 years old. Compared to the situation a year ago I do feel more sure and strong. 19 is the perfect age in the middle of all the big changes: one kind of knows how stuff works but doesn't have to face the real reality yet. So I enjoy my time. 

Now I have a better picture of myself. I'm starting to form steadier frames of my likes, my dislikes, my values and my environment. I would say this makes me overall happy. I know where to push my boundaries and know where my absolute limits are. 

Now I want to point out my friends. You know who you are and I know you are there for me. There's close to nothing that can break me when I know I have my friends besides me. This year has truly shaped my image of friendship and it surely has tested the whole concept.

If I was to describe this year with one word that'd be a terrible mess, a huge knot that has started to sort itself out little by little and still far away from clear. It was easily classified as a very tough year. I worked more than ever and ended up in the middle of a so much drama – without even noticing.

So this year I want to open my eyes and look around without forgetting to dream and imagine. There are way too many changes ahead to take. I will still. I want to try to survive the way I best know how to. Once again, I'm not 22 yet, but I'm still happy, free, confused and lonely at the same time. It's been and it will be miserable and absolutely magical. 

photo credit // daydreaming in the meadow by Jani Nordqvist

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birthday celebrations

It couldn't really have gotten more grown-up: a fancy restaurant with live jazz music and four of my best friends. I turned 19 years this Wednesday and man I had a good one! We started the evening by getting a bottle of nonalcoholic champagne and sitting in the park Esplanadi sipping the golden goodness and having awesome time.

I booked a table for us from the same restaurant I went on my birthday last year. This authentic Italian restaurant, Pjazza, serves delicious food right at the corner of Bulevardi. We had such a lovely dinner: pasta, salad and – of course – pizza. Even though my pasta was more than enough, somehow I ended up ordering what was about to become the best  pistachio gelato ever! I absolutely love this place and I'm pretty sure we'll be coming back next year too.

After a nice little stroll in the Kauppatori harbour we came across most likely the coolest café / bar / restaurant ever! This gorgeous masterpiece of interior stands right below the Uspensky Cathedral and serves amazing and amazingly strong coffee (well, that's for my super-sensitive tastebuds at least). On the wall it said "We are the kids that your parents warned you about!" which I think was such a cool finishing touch to the place!

Overall it was just the most perfect birthday I could think of! I am so lucky to have such amazing friends and to live in this beautiful country with my awesome family. I'm pretty grateful about everything, including my new Ted Baker top that I was wearing. I was also wearing bermuda shorts and a coat from Zara. My bag (of which you can see just the tiniest glimpse) is a birthday present of last year's, my treasured Mulberry. 

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my beautiful people graduated

Last Saturday was a day of tears, laughs, happiness. I've gotten to know these three amazing and gorgeous human beings during six years and this spring in particular. Now they have the white "berets" and I'll have yet another year to go before I'll deserve mine. 

My breakfast betrayed me: apparently a banana isn't the best option to go with when one has to stand for two hours in a crowd. After those couple of hours of almost fainting was the time for parties. These are some kind of receptions with cakes and the graduates themselves. I attended six parties in total which is quite an achievement if we're being honest.

I'd planned the day to the last minute, thought out the worst – and best – case scenarios yet somehow the day turned out even better I could have ever imagined. The best part was spending it with people who are dear to me. So once again, congratulations to you all!

In the end I have to mention I was wearing this gorgeous dress from Zara. I've become quite familiar and comfortable with skirts and dresses with the hem above my knees. This time I decided to go for something different and picked this midi dress in blush. It was absolutely perfect considering the warm but not blazing weather as the long hem kept me warm but was still cool thanks to the light fabric. 

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picnic in Suomenlinna

School's out! It's nearly +30 degrees. My school's student body including myself took the ferry to Suomenlinna, a breathtakingly gorgeous island right by Helsinki. Despite the little rain showers we laid out our picnic blanket, all the food and set up the barbecue. This easy-going evening with good company and brilliant  weather was just about the most perfect way to end school and start the summer holiday. 

This spring was one of the most stressful and hectic periods of time in my whole life. I've pushed myself to do so much and I couldn't be more happy with the outcome: new friends, new skills and new experiences. It definitely wasn't all rosy but absolutely worth it. I started this school year as a new-comer, once again, and now half the school knows my name. How crazy, how wonderful. Next up finals. 

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