31 July 2016

of farewells




It's easy to say goodbye to someone who's staying. It's easy when you're the one who's leaving. You're going to somewhere new while the others are stuck with the same old same. This time I'm staying and it's harder than I thought. It's also hard to stop when you've got the taste of running.

I'm going back to school in a couple of weeks. That's the end of summer, really. This summer is probably the first one I don't want to end, partly because I know in the end everyone will leave. It's breaking my heart. They're off to universities, internships and abroad. Everything I long for. While school is cool by giving me a logical daily schedule I hate the fact I'm tied up, stuck in this place for yet another year.

That takes us to the next topic: end of childhood. I'm not claiming to become an adult but I sure know I want to move out as soon as I can. I want to move abroad was it for school or work. After getting used to my home again post-exchange I feel like I've seen it all now (surely haven't but you know the deal). I need challenges.

In a way saying goodbye is a huge challenge. Sitting on the rocks of Suomenlinna and watching the sunset together was somewhat bitter sweet. It's the shallow part of my consciousness that gets it: in a short while they're all gone. Still I truly cannot comprehend they'd really be leaving. It's when you try to seize the moment because that's all you have for now. You don't want to cry yet you feel like you should. 

shirt / Sister Jane • watch / Daniel Wellington • earrings / House of Elliot

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