mist by lake

The morning was gray. So was the evening. This beautiful mist rose over the lake and the field surrounding the water. I absolutely adore the soft light one might catch at the certain hour of the evening. We took some liberties and climbed up to the birdwatching tower nearby. We managed to see two swans flying to North but in the end it wasn't even our goal to see birds. We also managed to have so so much fun taking photos. It's been a while since I previously had a proper photoshoot. It was honestly on the crying-out-of-laughing level. 

I've borrowed this coat from my lovely little sister. It is an A-line black hooded coat from Zara with some metal details. The leather gloves are my mother's so they are borrowed as well. I have found myself hoarding really dark brown clothes / accessories lately. Is this a thing? Anyway, the skirt is my own. It's just a very basic okra skirt from Zara. It's so handy especially considering I have it in dark forest green as well. They go with practically everything and build up an outfit really easily combined with some nice tights. Here you can't actually see the ones I'm wearing but they are black striped ones from Lindex (where I actually buy almost all of my tights, they have a brilliant selection!).

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Fore!

Having been ill for about a week now I have suffered from a serious lack of human interaction. It has been killing me, gah! It's not really the illness, the runny nose, the sore throat or even the hurtful cough, no. Apparently I have become a bit obsessed and depended on people. Friday night the people had a gathering kind of party-like evening thing. I got invited. Even my illness got invited. I had to say no.

Yesterday I picked three of those people from the station and drove them to my place. I had visited the grocery store, bought far too many kinds of biscuits, chocolate coated dried fruits and all that goodness. We sat on my floor, sipped coffee and played board games while casually chatting. Just what I had needed. The darkness crept in and and we headed to the golf course with all my cameras. It was awesome! Jumping, posing, painting with light... Thank you, for saving my social life!

Today I woke up. The throat ache is gone, the cough is gone. People, you are my placebo. 

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Kuusamo

My family used to drive 11 hours up North every year for a skiing holiday. As me and my sister got older this tradition faded away. Until now.

Skiing has been a great thing in my life and one of those very rare sports I genuinely enjoy. Living in Australia there wasn't to many options for skiing, barely none. So I skipped a year in skiing and learned how much I could miss it. A few weeks back my family flew to Kuusamo, a skiing town right below the border of Lapland. Three days on skies was amazing yet amazingly exhausting. I wasn't as rusty as my suit which had been bought to me nearly 10 years ago. Knowing me, I get cranky in "wrong" clothes.

It's not a vacation without a bit of shopping, right? I found beautiful snow wear in a tourist-money-ripping store which, obviously, wasn't even possible to get. So I did some research and found the same French-made eco-suit half the price. I ordered it, I got it and love it. If you're interested, here is the Picture snow suit. I absolutely love the fit and the colour. Above all, the clothes are organically made out of recycled materials which is a big thing to me at the moment. 

My father having spent his childhood in this beautiful nordic place my grand parents have a cottage in Kuusamo. So a couple of weeks after our first trip to North we packed the car and drove all the way like in good old times. 11 hours in a full car wasn't as devastating as one might imagine. That is, when we kids are old enough.

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mistakes

I most likely made a mistake today. It hurts so I don't wish to clarify.

The truth is, I make mistakes probably all the time. The smaller ones I'm glad not to notice so much anymore. I let them slip away. Then there are mistakes I make out of ignorance and then after a little while I let them slip away too. Finally are the ones I make consciously. I know the result and I weight its power. Yet I end up making them. I made one today.

I have a sort of a guideline that helps me making decisions. If the decision makes no difference to no one but myself I am able to make it and most likely not regret it. If it does, well, I think about regretting already when I'm trying to make the decision. So I won't. It's easy and clear and does no harm.

Today the decision made a difference only for myself. There is literally zero person who would be even a tiny bit interested or offended by my decision. Still, here I am, regretting and pondering over a quite a small detail in my day I consider I failed. Here comes the philosopher: was I to consider the situation through consequentialism I would {surprisingly} notice my decision was the right one even though my instant and very critical {it seems} moralism shouts something very different.

As much as I want to mark myself as a bad human being in the end I have to rely on my ruling guideline. What's done is done and I can't change it anymore. Also what's done was meant to be done which means this will take me somewhere. This kind of keeps me sane time to times.

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the sad little suede skirt

I am a mishap magnet, ask anyone. Seriously.

I've always been an eager and excited kind of person. Most of the time it appears as joy and happiness and energy. Some other times it backfires and it isn't fun anymore. I bet everyone who knows me knows also the story back when I was in lower secondary school. It was a sunny afternoon in the beginning of spring. I was in a domestic science class with my friends. I was told to melt some butter in the microwave and so I did. The problem here was, you see, that all the plastic bowls were in use so I grabbed the next reasonable container I saw. A teflon pan. Yes, a teflon pan. And yes, I put the teflon pan in the microwave and the end of the story didn't look pretty.

There ain't a day without tripping, falling or swirling in the life of mine. It's a constant soap opera which, I have to admit, I do kind of like. During the musical I tripped in the stairs for I don't even know how many times. I ran and almost hit the door. A year ago in Australia I only walked and still hit a glass door. On my first year in upper secondary school I accidentally dropped my calculator from the second floor to the first and it almost hit my friend in head.

The little accidents like the ones beneath happen to me all the time out of pure ignorance. I just didn't know. Oh, had I known one is not supposed to wash leather. About a month ago someone spilled their drink on my dear brown suede skirt, the one I really, really loved. So I got back home and put it in the washing machine myself thinking I would save my mom form the job. I washed the leather skirt and put it in the drying cabinet. This is when my mom had a look and had a fright. Dear God what have you done! My skirt was ruined. We sent it to drycleaner's and it came back the day before yesterday, all bleached and shrunken. You can only imagine my grief. And who was I to blame this for? Myself and only myself.

The point I want to make is that I mess up a lot. I make so many mistakes all the time. Yet I'm here and I haven't lost a thing when I really think about it. It's quite the opposite, actually. I've learned quite a bit the hard way but the point is I have learned. I haven't put a teflon pan to the microwave ever since and neither will I wash leather ever again. The loss of a skirt, a piece of fabric that, sure, cost me some money hasn't been the end of my life before and therefor it shouldn't be now either. I'm still quite mesmerised how bad can my luck be when it comes to skirts. They all have faced very horrible endings.

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